It is natural for young people to be critical of their parents at times and to blame them for most of the misunderstanding between them. They have always complained more or less justly, that they are possessive and dominant; that they do not trust their children to deal with cr; that they talk too much about certain problems; and that they have no sense of humor, at least in parent-child relationships.
I think it is true that parents often underestimate their age children and also forget how they themselves felt when young.
Young people often irritate parents with their choices in clothes and hairstyles, in entertainers and music. This is not their motive. They feel cut off from the world into which they have not yet accepted. So they create a culture and society of their own. Then, if it turns out that their music or entertainers or vocabulary or clothes or hairstyles irritate their parents, this gives them additional enjoyment. They feel they are superior, at least in a small way, and that they are leaders in style and taste.
Sometimes you are resistant and proud because you do not want your parents to approve of what you do. If they did approve, it looks as if you are betraying your own age group. But in that case, you are assuming that you are the underdog (处于劣势): you can’t win but at least you can keep your honor. This is a passive way of looking at things. It is natural enough after long years of childhood, when you were completely under your parents’ control. But it ignores the fact that you are now beginning to be responsible for yourself.
If you plan to control your life, cooperation can be part of that plan. You can impress others, especially your parents, into doing things the way you want. You can impress others with your sense of responsibility and initiative, so that they will give you the authority to do what you want to do.
To improve parent-child relationships, agers are advised to be ______.